Managing Well-Being In You & Your Family

Mental health issues such as anxiety can come along in waves when you are least expecting it, and during these times, it can often feel like we have lost control.

Our children and young people can experience the exact same feelings of overwhelm, withdrawal and fear as we do. Some will be able to verbalise this, while some may become angry, irritable or withdrawn. They will certainly be picking up on your concerns and the way you act and behave with them.

Why do we feel anxious?

There are many factors that might make us feel anxious. For example, changes in routines, lack of control over choices, fear about our wellbeing of others, uncertainty about the future (and the present!)

One way of thinking about this is seeing ourselves as a ‘bucket’. Each one of us has so much capacity. Varying elements in our lives fill up our buckets and they can fill at different rates. If our bucket becomes too full and overflows, we then feel overwhelmed.

What helps if you feel anxious?

F = Focus on what’s in your control

• You can’t control everything, but you can control what is going on in your home and with your children.

A = Acknowledge your thoughts and feelings

• Allow yourself to recognise when you feel anxious

C = Come back into your body

• Stand up or press feet to the floor; or place your hands on a chair.
• Shrug your shoulders.
• Take some slow and deep breaths.

E = Engage in what you’re doing

• Be present.
• What is in front of you-look at your hands?
• What can you hear or smell around you?
  
  

Tops tips for promoting positive well-being at home

Learn our top tips and strategies for managing well-being in you and your family below.

Create times and ways to discuss worries with your children

Sometimes it can be easier talking about worries when you are not directly doing so

• Play a game of cards, do some colouring or painting, do a jigsaw together or prepare a meal. It can be easier for your children to talk at these times when they can see you are more relaxed as well. You can have a more ‘normal’ conversation.
  
  
• Have a worry box where worries can be posted. They can be taken away each day (and you can see what is concerning your child.
  
  
• Build an ‘anger volcano’

o You could build this with Lego blocks, papier-mâché or Playdoh or draw a volcano (good for planning, turn taking, creativity, and fine motor skills)

o You could find out everything about volcanoes- how they look, where are the biggest ones around the world (geography, history)

o Discuss with your child how a volcano rumbles and then erupts and how this can relate feelings we have when we get angry or feel out of control.

o Talk to your child about how they feel when they want to ‘erupt’ and what can be done to stop that from happening.

Set time each day to do fun-stuff together

• Write a family song or use kitchen instruments to create music together.
  
  
• Make a family history - your child could interview your family members on the phone or on the internet.
  
  
• Cook together and do activities in the kitchen – your children can learn about food from other countries; maths concepts (fractions, weights, calculating amounts); fine motor tasks such as cutting up and even undertaking Science experiments.
  
  
• Watch live webcam from the zoos around the world.
  
  
• Learn a new skill together – playing cards, learning another language, painting or drawing.
  
  
• Read a book together- a few pages every day can help.

Create a regular time for exercise

It will help with sleep and mood too e.g. Do some yoga together or do a daily activity class like Joe Wicks daily class. There are plenty of free workouts available on YouTube!

Older children and teens

• Give them lee way as this is particularly hard for teenagers when peers are becoming more important than parents in terms of identity formation.
  
  
• Ensure they have some privacy, even if they have to use your bedroom during the day to have some space away from everyone.
  
  
• Offer regular opportunities to talk but don’t expect them to accept but keep the ‘door open’.
  
  
• Try to reduce arguments by holding regular family meetings especially if you have teens in the house.
  
  
• Do some shared activity e.g. create a family tree and interview family members.
  
  
• Cook together – use this opportunity to learn the basics. https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/collection/kids-cookin

Children's Mental Health Advice & Support

For more useful resources like this, download our Children's Mental Heath Support Pack.