Resources

Managing Family Get-Togethers

22 August 2023

This article, written by Gemma Hickey, Assistant Psychologist for our Group, provides practical advice and support for children who struggle with the overwhelm of participating in family gatherings.

Children may struggle with family get-togethers for many reasons, including changes to their routine, sensory overload or feeling overstimulated. There are ways to support your child with managing these gatherings and even helping them to develop their skills along the way.

Here are some tips on how to prepare for and manage those whole-family get-togethers:

Routine and predictability

Give the child enough time to be ready to interact with relatives and friends. Before the get-together, talk to your child about what to expect and who will be there. Using invitations as a visual aid or practising with your child by doing role plays is a great idea. This will allow you and your child to prepare for the occasion together.

Communicate with family

Extended family members can be essential to the support system you build for your child and yourself. They should be made aware of what may distress your child, but it’s also important to give them tips on what works in advance. If they know your child’s triggers and the coping mechanisms that help, they’ll be better able to adapt their own behaviours and interactions to support your child.

Sensory overload

Family get-togethers can be busy, overwhelming environments that can affect any of the five senses. The most likely cause of sensory overload is surprises, such as balloons popping or other children screaming. Understanding your child’s triggers and preparing in advance can help you minimise the chances of them becoming overloaded.

Emotional dysregulation

No matter how much you prepare for a family gathering, it’s still likely that things will become overwhelming at some point, and your child may become dysregulated. When this occurs, it’s a good idea to have a backup plan. If possible, create a “break plan”, which may include identifying a quiet room, using a weighted blanket, engaging with sensory-friendly toys, or taking a moment to enjoy favourite foods.

Boredom

Some children may need help staying busy during a family get-together, making them restless and bored. To try and minimise this, it is important to recognise when your child becomes bored and help them become aware of it. Find appropriate ways to keep your child busy, such as using fidget toys, playing games or giving them a responsibility like being in charge of the music.

Family gatherings can be stressful for both children and parents, but with the right preparation and communication, you can navigate the tough situations and focus on enjoying those special moments.